Goose the Blog 2.0

First) Sting started trending uncool during the Synchronicity tour, when it became apparent that he was becoming Sting the big-time celebrity instead of Sting the lead singer of The Police. Unfortunately, appearing in a David Lynch film, which normally increases coolness, didn't help, because that film was "Dune". He became even less cool in 1985 when he released his first solo album Dream of the Blue Turtles as a white Englishman fronting a pretty good, un-named, African-American jazz band. He cemented his uncool status shortly after that when he appeared in the documentary film "Bring on the Night", which was about Sting and the making of his first solo album, and was (unbelievably!) named after a very good Police song.

Second) While Sting is unarguably uncool, that verdict is not entirely clear about Elvis Costello, and reasonable people may disagree. However, I think Costello became uncool when he reappeared in 1991 for the Mighty Like a Rose tour and was fat and bearded. All fat, bearded people are not uncool, but a fat, bearded Elvis Costello was uncool. Some classical albums, many duets and collaborations, and a car commercial later, Elvis Costello was still, unfortunately, uncool.

P.S. The rest of you, by not answering the questions, obviously think Sting and Elvis Costello are cool. I feel sorry for you, because you probably think Madonna is cool, too.

Labels: pop culture